i have a family here on earth

{James and Becky at Rachel Bee's Birthday Bash February 2009}

What drew you to your spouse?

The first time I met James, we were at a church dance. I always walked around and asked the poor lonely fellows sitting by themselves to dance during the slow songs. This wasn't completely altruistic. It saved me from sitting out the song, too. Unfortunately, sometimes there is a reason those fellows didn't dance during the slow songs... But when I asked the blonde boy with glasses and a notepad to dance, I was pleasantly surprised to see that he could actually keep his end of the conversation. And joked! Yes!

Fast forward a couple years. That boy with the notepad was at another dance. Only this time he was singing on stage with a ska band. I had just broken up with my boyfriend (at the dance) and wanted to secure this break up with getting a date with another boy. It wasn't the first time me and this other guy had broken up.

So I got myself a date with James. The leadsinger of Ten Point Landing, and past boy with a notepad and sense of humor.

Sounds pretty good right?

He was cute.

I thought he might have a good voice... the acoustics in a church gym full of noisy teenagers aren't always the best. (His voice is nice, he even had his own song played on the radio for me once)

Sense of humor.

And as we dated more times, because we seemed to get along pretty well, I learned other things about him.

Like
He's pretty smart
and he likes to do fun things like kayak
and he's a pretty good thumbwrestler

which is how I found out he is a pretty good kisser, too.

and he had a strong testimony of the Gospel.

And I learned that he has an awesome family.

A family of the sort that I wanted to have some day.

The kind that I would like to be a part of.

Forever.

I loved that his parents sat next to each other on the couches that they'd had for twenty years, and knitted. Both of them. And I realized that they may have been doing that to keep an eye on us rascally teenagers. But I loved them even more for that, because...

They had the Gospel in their lives, unlike my parents who thought I was a little bit of a weirdo for going to church for three hours every Sunday and they just don't have the same belief system and that pretty much sums up our differences in a very small nutshell.

And because James's family had the Gospel in their lives, they cared about what James and I were doing.

And then, besides James's awesome and interesting, and often entertaining parents, he has all these sisters... and nieces... and a couple nephews.

I loved the whole atmosphere of love and happiness within his family.

Becky was the first sister that I felt like I connected with. She gave me good advice like: have a short engagement. And we went to see frivolous movies at the theatre (think Princess Diaries 2!) and she was mainly just really fun and funny.

I haven't been wanting to think or talk about what happened. I started blogging again, because Becky's husband Mike told me he would blog if I would.

So here I am, crying like a baby because there isn't anything else really to do in a situation like this.

James's sister Becky passed away on October 8. She left four children and a husband, three sisters, one brother, her parents, scores of in-laws and nieces and nephews and a Grandma behind her. She's in a wonderful place, but that doesn't mean we want her there right now. I love and loved her, and can't wait to see her littlest son and daughter tomorrow morning. And give them great big hugs.

James's family is still awesome. I'm so glad to be tied eternally to such a fabulous family. The way they supported Becky and still support her family is amazing. You should see the fish costume Sarah made Abby. And the way Abby ran through the house with it on, knowing that she had the coolest costume ever! And Jim and Linda staying with their sweet grandbabies... It makes me cry again. I thought this family was awesome before I married in. But I didn't know the half of it. God is Great. I only wish sometimes I could understand a little more of his plans. And as I type I can feel the little whisper of the Spirit remind me that are all lots of little ways that we can catch a glimpse of Heavenly Father's master plan.

May the Lord be with you all through your trials and triumphs.